Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Chewy Winds of Despair and Grace

Can you believe these windy ideas? I think we will all be swept into the Hudson today.

Last night I had a dream that I was continually burning things: a cheese souffle in the kitchen, a weird crusty pie on the moon. Yes I was on the moon, magnetically pulled to its surface, pretty much ok, pretty much feeling out in space but not bouncing around, weightless. I had just learned I was not the winner of America's Next Top Model and was consoling myself, making said crusty pie. Then I was back on earth, consoling the dealers whom I had hoped to show with: it's ok, I don't need you, don't feel weird, I will find someone else. I was trying to work harder on my renderings of the lunar surface in ballpoint. Then I realized someone I care for deeply had been involved with a female country singer (very upsetting). Then I went to a waterslide amusement park with PD and could not go on the menacing conveyor belt squish-splash ride. PD jumped right in. I could not. I met her at the cafe at the end, near the parking lot. Sorry, PD. You weren't too mad.

See you soon,

MM

35 comments:

Cheese Souffle said...

Please stop burning me. I am worth preserving at a lower temperature.

fairy butler said...

moon rocks, squish, pie, burns - ham paw, what do you make of this alignment?

Squid said...

It is a series of choices he has made, a list of options he has not provided himself. He knows he must live with this.

mountain man said...

You are right. I can only hope my family will forgive me.

Scrunchee said...

I am taking a picture of someone else's fortitude and pretending to own it. I am made of purple velvet. I am from long ago.

mountain man said...

Scrunchee you are making me so sad.

fairy butler said...

scrunchee!! stay back you harbinger of cheerleading and all vapidness. please allow mm safe passage this dewy morn.

mountain man said...

I have a letter to write to my brain:

Dear Brain,

I am sorry I have damaged you with so much memory eraser potion. I am also sorry to admit that I will not stop damaging you. I hope you have the strength to carry on despite my treatment of you.

Love,

MM

Scrunchee said...

I am your brain MM. You cannot stop me from messing everything up.

elixers said...

we love you mm. we will never stop loving you.

Brain in a Bat said...

no one can hurt me.

krixkrox said...

Your dream is very adventuresome MM. I would have avaoided the ride too. PD is brave.

postmoderndebunker said...

Hey chicken MM--what is up with that? No slide? That slide was a flowing with Jack Daniels elixir! No, I was not mad, but sorry you did not partake in the fun. Next time I will dangle a hot dog at the base of the slide.

Mountain Man said...

I came home for an hour to eat free food. Then I am going back to the studio. My free food, a.k.a. food in the apartment mainly consists of Skippy super chunk on pita breads over and over until satisfied and then baby carrots just to make me feel better. Then I am headed back down to the shack. Baby marks, one at a time are what today is about. Also, good music and many mucho tears cried. What is up with that shit? The eyes are all puffed. I don't know. Something about everything passing each minute accumulating into years and decades that I cannot quite digest.

Also, I listened to Lenny Lopate today, Philip Gourevitch was subbing for him, there was an interview with a new biographer of Herman Melville (I forget the guy's name, he teaches at Columbia) - anyway it was one of the best interviews I have heard in a while. I think you can get a podcast of it - 2 literary dorks getting all excited about this strange, murky manic depressive (possibly) writer who was able to express both his spiritual belief (expressed in all things natural and sublime) and his doubts, his sense of being adrift, powerless in the vast nothingness. They talked at length about Moby Dick, one of the best books ever, and anyway this was really intense to listen to.....

I am in some kind of pre-bday feeling of feelings. The pics you posted, Krix, on your blog of you and your friends now and then are so moving to me. Time just passes. You are the same and not the same. It's so hard to comprehend, not nec. sad but just what are we supposed to do with this information? That at first we were nervous to know what we were going to be and now we kind of know...and the nostalgia kicks in with tears of unknown category. I don't know what they mean.

Sorry I sound so maudlin. Nothing is bad, it just all seems so strange, everywhere today.

Ok, back to studio to try to channel the weirdness into little marks.

fairy butler said...

oh gentle mm. i think you need to climb up on a thistle today. time does pass and it is weird and intense to stand back and look at it and think about the past/present/future quadrant. i hope you are able to channel it it into the relics this eve.

by the way, my friend's father jim is a melville scholar. he's a great guy. weird. i dunno.

ham said...

that was an amazing interview. I loved it too. Now I have to ready moby dick again! It was so inspiring to think of this man toiling all day and doing magics at night.

krixfort said...

MM you are the sweetest MM. I am mostly thinking about time these days and am often immobilized by memory. Time tunnel of the mind. . .I cannot comprehend either. You are right, not exactly sad but. . .maybe just contemplative.

Unca Stinky's Beau said...

Dear MM:
Indeed some days are a trial to get through...those damn little marks on a drawing call to be placed, just so, and just so..and it can be so frustrating when you want to just have inspiration flow, and be amazed at the results.
Makes you treasure the days when Inspiration hits..now if I could just gag a few of my non-appreciative clients who insist on doing stupid things - with my name attached to the results....
God knows, they are so sincere...
Hang in there, Inspiration and hard work has go hand in hand, no matter what the task.
Speaking of Dreams, Unca Stinky had a really wierd one last night.. but I'm not sharing!!!
Chin up dear..

pd said...

Time wounds all heels, MM!
You could be old--like me. But you are still a wee lass.

All hearts on you...

xo

Magix Man said...

Wow, I love this blog. So creative and fun. I think you are very magical.

Corny said...

MM, the jeasus year is a tough one though jeasus did his best work at the age of 33...
Heres what I was thinking when I was 33. This is cut and pasted from my diary.
"I'm an oldlady,alone. what if i slip on the wet bathroom floor and crack my head open, I'd be lying on the floor staring at a piece of my own brain wondering how long it will be untill someone discovers me, my brain will probabley get infected by all the chinatown scum i track into my house every day?"

Corny said...

Sorry for spelling Jesus wrong, I'm constantly humiliating myself, it's a way of life really.

Corny said...

MM you are a kitten in a basket with tears of joy/saddness that express the beauty and saddness of time passing.
be kind to thyself.

Mountain Man said...

Corny, I am dying!!!!!! That is such a great thing to write. Thank you for sharing. It is brilliant and I feel you. Plus there are kittens everywhere.

Now I have this idea to plunder the earliest MM writing just for laughs. It would be much more puerile than that, I know.

Hams, I am glad you caught that interview too. It really was incredible.

And Unca Stinky's Beau, wow I can't believe me eyes! Nice to see you here!!!! Hope you are well. And your beau. Love to you.

Heart As Arena said...

Magix Man. Finally somebody in the artblogosburble who will understand when I use the word "ferhootzed", and thrill to the scent of cup cheese.

ManCorn. Y'all are giving me a wonderfully sweet and full-on experience of heartlash.

Man. Too funny. I am just a little over a decade ahead of you. I wish Demuth had painted a 3. I guess I have work to do if I am having Corny's visions now. Yet, it has been an amazing decade. 'Specially the end of it. Shed dat skin.

Thanks to all and to all a good thanks.

PS: Man. I dub thee Ronnie James Dio.

magix man said...

Hi Heart! I LOVE Ronnie James Dio and Rainbow. I sometimes use the song "Mystery" in my act, along with "Holy DIver"

Heart As Arena said...

Actually, when I referred to Man I meant the Main Man, the Mountain Man. However, if Magix uses it in their set then they get to keep the Ronnie James Dio. MM. You are now Ritchie Blackmore. You were of the deepest purple, but now you only play in castles. No shame in that. Everybody sing.

pd said...

Smoke on the water....fire in the sky...

AlsoArthur said...

random alert...

Finally heard the whole Art Brut record. Great song called 'Modern Art'.

"Modern art
makes me..
want to rock out!"

Keep rockin out artpeeps!

krixfort said...

I've fired up the air guitar.

magix man said...

I was just excited to see someone reference Ronnie James Dio.

Mountain Man said...

Arthur, I love that song. First heard it via Corny. Heart. That you think these things is glorious. I am happy to know you in this freeing referential feeling-ful way. Anything you want to call me or anyone else is yes and right. I am deep into purple, a prunish purple, and I am not coming out until way later.

Magix. I have a theory about you. You know who you are and you know what I mean. Covert attitudes are good for the pipes.

Magix Man said...

Mountain Man: I wave my wand at you! Do you like magix as much as I do?

Magix Man said...

"Holy Diver, you've been gone too long in the midnight sea--oh what's becoming of me!"

Heart As Arena said...

HaHa. Everybody making me happy. I return the favor . . . from the rockheads (I mean that in a good way) at Space 1026 . . . http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/1595/1239/1600/IMG_1217.jpg