Friday, March 31, 2006

Pleasantness

What I am praying for is a feeling of pleasantness and calm, a soothingness to enter the pipes and sacs. The blog party begins tomorrow evening, the ritual sacrifices will be made in honor of hard and soft core bloggers. There will be drug-induced trance states and sex with knives and forks, be careful and get ready, bring a bib and some cleaning agents, some sani-wipes, is what I suggest.

58 comments:

w.w. said...

i do not have any infectious diseases. i will bring my spork.

mountain man said...

I don't have any diseases except I am lousy, that's all. I have a spork too. It's in my rucksack.

mountain man said...

I am sweaty.

mountain man said...

What color is your spork? Mine is green.

w.w. said...

mine is gray from use. some food is stuck but i will try to clean. i have armpit smell and extra hair. i hope it will not offend. i am basically the missing link.

vapor eyes said...

I have the fist spork ever made. I never use it, of course.

Curious Jello said...

What is a fist spork?

randy said...

I have a Sprick. It's a spoon, fork and you know, a tool of multifunction, though I assure you, I am now Swiss.

mountain man said...

I have an affection for Swiss instruments. Randy. Heel.

w.w. said...

i have a fondue pot with several matching sporks. each person gets their own crusty spork with which to stir the steaming bile.

mountain man said...

Oh WW you give me the swirling turd feeling.

hammy said...

I bring the rice crispy treats and a tub of ass.

mountain man said...

I could use more ass. Please smear it on my old ass and re-furbish it like new.

Frogs said...

I am reaping rewards for embattled psychic interventions. My portions are small, my tongue is glib, but menace is my connect-the-dots.

vapor eyes said...

I want some some caramel fondue. I also want a few good spricks.

alto sax said...

Tonight I ate too much raw fish. The stomach aches with fullness and the tinlking of mercury abounds. Birth defects are a coming.

Minty fresh said...

Who let my cat out? Where's bunny? Bunny? Where are you?

Mercurial said...

The raw fish is good for your gonads, if you are the type who is in possession of such. I can help.

Frogs said...

Have you heard what happens to the swimmers in the dark pond? There is not enough to go around. You get charged $2.00 every ten minutes. They swipe your card until your accounts are depleted.

alto sax said...

I do have a gonad only. My brother has the other.

gwendoline said...

Frogs, you seem sad.

Clamor said...

Hi. I am suitable.

aldo nova said...

I have run out of gonads.

Frogs said...

Frogs can't be sad. Frogs is hopeful.

Fruity said...

This is confusing, who is who.

pan american said...

Frogs keeps me going--keeps me thinkin the good things--keeps me in dreams.

rotary phone said...

I am so tired of Moby.

Frogs said...

Please help me then, I am in need of closing the gap between my peripheral eyes. I want to see what's in front of me, instead of what's on the sides.

alto sax said...

I gotta get out of these leather pants! They stink. I haven't had them cleaned since 1991.

Fred Lipman said...

i am confusing. who has the leather pants? are you an actor?

pan american said...

Frogs, you must practice a seeing meditation. Close your eyes and repeat: Seeing, seeing, seeing, straight ahead, seeing. Do this several times until you fall asleep and forget about it all.

Alto Sax said...

I am a musician turned actor. These pants have seen so much action back in the day at CBGB'S. Debbie Harry threw up on them, Chrissy Hynde wiped her bloody nose on them....but recently, Nicole Kidman spat on them.

Chew Toy of a Whore said...

i am natty brown fur stains. i am snouty toothless pushy.

Marty potempkin said...

Freddy, Freddy Lipman is that really you? Where you been, pal? How are Sally and the kids?

Pan Am said...

Chew toy, I'd like to take you in the woods when I go to meet Gwen.

Fred Lipman said...

I remain unmarried. I am against children.

color theory said...

An owl just flew into my window--FA-REAKY SHIT!

Marty said...

Sorry, Fred, I thought you were another Fred. If you are against marriage, does that mean you like it from behind sometimes? Cause I'd be interested.

splinter in the thumb said...

I'm in agony over here. A bat just plucked out my eye.

randy said...

Chew Toy, today is your lucky day.

Fred Lipman said...

My name is actually Judy and yes I would love to take it backways.

Fred Lipman said...

I am tired and want to succumb to narcolepsy.

fugu said...

Where's Sushi Blameful?

Pan Am said...

Take it from me, Fred /Judy, it is never too early to succumb.

Smashup said...

Sushi is in the stomach of the one who ate him.

Marty said...

Oh, uh, sorry Judy, but I thought maybe you had a hairy ass.

alto sax said...

SUSHI...NOOOOOoooooooooooooo

alto sax said...

Oh shit, I am so sorry, I am so fucking sorry. What am I gonna do now?

Frogs said...

new topics in picturesque behavioralism are coming my way.

splinter in the thumb said...

I can't keep all you guys straight. So get bent. This owl is yapping in my ear and it is eating a tootsie pop too.

Alto said...

Frogs: do you know what to do about Sushi?

Fran L. said...

I love sleep because it is both pleasant and safe to use. Pleasant because one is in the best possible company and safe because sleep is the consummate protection against the unseemliness that is the invariable consequence of being awake. What you don't know won't hurt you. Sleep is death without the responsibility.

randy said...

Lick Frogs, eat Sushi.

fran l. said...

Life is something that happens when you can't get to sleep.

sashimi mournful said...

What happen dear Sushi? I lost without you.

Orlando said...

fran, you are correct about the sleeps, but. life teems and you must honor that, too, undulate with the teems, drink it in, piss it out. take it.

w.w. said...

ya'll -r- fucked up yo. i caught an infectious disease on the v train. i will premake the fondue and freeze it. i will ziploc the bile for safekeeping. i will not go out amongst em tonight. sleepy sporky meeeee

The Capt'n said...

Sea Monkey and I are sure bummed that we don't get to meet and enjoy you kids at the NY blog convention. We'll be in your vicinity NEXT weekend, however, so I'll just cross my sad lil' fingers in hopes that maybe some of the chil'ren might want to do a semi-modified Round Two....
In the meantime, we'll check back for any evidence or posted images from Round One.
Now Kelli, you be nice to the ladies. Frogs, here's hoping you can turn that frown upside-down. W.W., I'll hold the image of you shitting your Hammertime pants in my mind's eye (probably forever,) and Corny, as you were, Sir.