Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Ice Skating

The wondrous magic of ice skating is what I am now considering. Swirls and nice glittery outfits. Big happy smiles. I need to say more, I know, but first I have to get rid of a portion of myself.

20 comments:

pus said...

Don't do it. I had a bad experience this morning. I went to the dentist and the hygenist was looking at my chart and I had circled phychiatric problems. She couldn't read the tiny print of the form and asked me what it was that I had circled. I said softly, "phychiatric problems." She couldn't hear me. She made me repeat myself loudly several times. Then she said "Oh." but then I thought about Jesus on the Cross and I stopped feeling weird.

mountain man said...

dear pus,

i truly feel sorry for you. but are you saying that i should not think about ice skating because you told your dental hygienist that you have psychiatric problems? that makes little sense. also, just a word of caution to you, it may help you if you can spell your particular affliction properly. no offense. i have psychiatric problems too, believe me. curse that dental bitch for causing you embarrassment.

good luck to you. but please do not expect jesus on the cross to help you. he will not, he just will not. he is long dead. there is no magic there. this is my true belief. instead, why don't you pray to the fairies and elves to help you? perhaps a wizard if you are uncomfortable with the aforementioned?

i love you,

MM

Satoshi said...

Helen Bicklesworth and I are taking ice dancing lessons. It's less flashy than the ice skating but we can still wear matching shiny outfits. I am glad you appreciate this true art form. We are really learning how to be in synch with each other. We are heading into our twilight years.

fairy butler said...

I second MM's comment about jesus on the cross. NOT to be trusted. Try praying to a pet rock or cuddle with a kitty. Then we'd be talking.

pus said...

I resent the questioning of my unalterable faith. A rock is not a rock unless it is the foundation of zion. i'm just saying. Also there are times when dentistry is instructive regarding evil spirits and idolatry. My spelling is god's spelling. It is right if I spell because I am using the gifts of the spirit, meaning the gift of writing.

mountain man said...

dear pus,

you sound like you were abandoned as a child. my graces go out to you. however, jesus really won't help you. but i can. why don't you come over to my house for some boston cream pie and ginger ale. we can look at kiddie porn together.

call me,

MM

pus said...

okay, but I don't like kids. They have little teeth. Tiny teeth are threatening, in truth.

mountain man said...

Understood. I prefer a gummy smile myself. It's easier to play skin flute when you have no teeth, if you receive my meaning. I have to adjust my pants a little now.

Meredith said...

Listen, my name is Meredith and I know a thing or two about skating. I am a championship figure skater. I went to Worlds in 1999. I came in 4th, just missing the bronze. It's a great sport. It helps if you have nice teeth. Pus it's good to hear you went to the dentist, although your name leads me to believe you could not possibly be healthy enough to skate. I have great thighs.

pus said...

i don't get your meaning MM. A skin flute sounds like fun maybe. Is it a new type of instrument. Forgive my ignorance. I was home schooled.

mountain man said...

If you let me pull out your nice white teeth then you can give me a nice gummy treatment in the 2 rocks and a stick area. Get me now?

Gummy said...

I am all ready to go on the no teeth thing. Lemme at your pants!

pus said...

huh? Are you an archeologist? I've heard that they still use sticks to scratch away at sites. I have always wanted to go to Biblical sites and scratch on holy stones.

Orange Crush said...

Hi Pus. I want to make a party with you and Rat. Let's go do it to it!

mountain man said...

Pus I feel badly for you. You sound like a mole. Are you nearly blind?

pus said...

I have contact lenses, but I am considering laser surgery. These are the last days and I need to see Christ coming. The moles will rejoice and flow up onto the grass.

mountain man said...

that's a nice thought, the moles flowing onto the grass. i will think about it all night. thanks.

pus said...

You think I'm joking. I'm not. This is biblical truth telling. I am not playing metaphore. I am playing REAL

postmoderndebunker said...

Stop trying to steal my goal Mountain Man. You will never land a quadrouple axle so cleanly that Dick Buttons would cream his jeans.

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