I am sending out a distress call to Doktor Wyrd, will you please swoop in and save me? There are many issues:
1. My boat is sinking.
2. My torso is full of pains.
3. I am considering garden hosing myself.
4. I am being kicked out of my shack right after my show opens.
5. I am disassociating.
6. There are swellings on the inside of my gut. My gut is connected to my brain and as we all know that is pretty much fucked, so there are two sites of error, two vile sites of error.
7. Krakow's liver is necrotic.
8. Poodles have taken over my soul. They are fouling everything.
I cannot focus on the tasks at hand, the tasks are not completing themselves. My inner hairstyle is mussed. Please, if you see Doktor Wyrd, tell him about the hose. He will not be happy but he will know what to do.
30 comments:
I have a hose. I believe they are compatible, our hoses.
Is your hose green? Mine is. It's salacious.
Mine is lascivious, and yes you could consider it green.
Well I will consider it green then. I am looking for street grade heroin. Can anyone help me?
I only have hillbilly heroin, and a slutty nurse.
Yes PD thank you. I like hillbillies. There is a valve missing. I am calling the Doktor now.
Da Da dair dair dair dair dairr dairrrr Dairrrrrrrrrrr
STOP PD!!!!!!!!!!!!! Very naughty.
i am pulling on the lavendar sweats. fanny pack of beernuts at the ready.
i was not murdered and drowndead last night, but locked out of my home with no money. wandered the streets until arthur could rescue me....
Fb, quelle relief! Lockout no good. Hooray for Arthur.
Thank god Minerva lives around the corner or I would be doomed.
What is this shack business MM? Worry making.
poodles down! Your soul will be fine. I've got some good tinctures in my closet box of pharmacology.
i have no patience for beige.
mm i have the fix. it is small and blue and goes well with boone's farm. who did this shack shift to you? i will take action. i will karate chop.
The doktor is busy huffing anaesthetic, MM. He is bogarting the hose. I will try to wrest it from him.
Oh MM, I'm sorry about the torso acting up... thats bad news, can you try visualizing offending torso floating through puffy clouds being massaged by poodles? I am sending you love beams and they're shooting acrosss the city at a million light years per second. You should have gotten them by now.
MM, I'm sorry about your troubles. They sound serious. Sadly I have nothing to offer in the way of help. But perhaps if we get to meet this weekend I'll be able to think of something brilliant to say, to at least distract you for a moment from the pains in your torso. The odds aren't great, though, given the weak state of my brain these days, so I'll bring 50 yards of garden hose as a backup. And maybe Turkish vallium if I can remember.
MM, sad to hear of your troubles. I have sent off multiple beacons to scour the land for information. As far is feeling better goes. My girl G is at a bar in Florida right now. There is a drink on the menu named "the red headed whore". Would ingesting this help? I will get the recepie.
MM, I will gladly thrust my middle finger in the direction of that vile person who took away your shack. I am retrieving my combat boots and bomber jacket from the attic and am packing my spike encrusted baseball bat and heading your way. I will cherish a glorious encore clockwork orange performance.
Dear MM:
Terribly upset about the terrific troubles... Shack issues- we are directing bad kamra towards said individuals...
Was thrilled to see paintings on website (PU's blabbed)!
Kitty is sending fuzzy happy thoughts ur way!
MM, I want to thank, I want to thank you, I want to thank you... for coming ...to my rock n roll show.
Hi boobers, I am loving all of you. Yes. Thank you. Please, be my pals in the ether forever and ever more.
PS - Kill me when you see me.
Dearest Art Brut,
What a wonderful time I had this evening. The dimples became themselves on my cheeks (face and tush) and I have never felt more relaxed.
Eager to thumb war, eager to punch in the box,
Faithfully yours,
D
My box was punched so many times tonight, that I cannot fall asleep. Ow.
my box hurts.
Mine too. It's killing.
I am sitting on a block of ice. I am way too tired. I'm old.
I'm old too. It is poisonous.
Gil Mantera's Party Dream.
I am still trying to wake myself up. I can feel the soil falling over my head.
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