Hello chums. It's Easter time. Time to chew on little animals! Time to use their pelts as head coverings in the cold. Little lambies, little bun buns, little chickies!!! Come to me, my animal friends. It is time to get maimed.
Hey just kidding. I love Easter, for its Pagan rituals. I bought Beth a white soft soft soft furry little baby lamb. He is perfect and I will tell you why. He has sticky brown stuff on his one leg. Beth deserves him because she has been extra good lately, but also because there is something wrong with her. And so too is there something wrong with the lamb. I am always seeking out symbolism, that's my Mountain Man way.
OK, well that's all for now. Thanks for being my chums.
I have a plan to go roller skating tomorrow. I will have to focus very intensely to find my balance.
I have a stomach ache. I ate so much today. I'll tell you: lots of popcorn, fish and vegetables, shrimp cocktail, 2 carrots, 2 pieces of toast with peanut butter and a lamb's skin.
ReplyDeleteBoy am I feeling funny. I am trapped in my room. I can hear people talking outside it and I hate them because they are more fortunate than me. That is the original reason why I was hospitalized. I am not getting better is the sad part. I am filled with paranoia and rage. I incessantly spill juice. It is not a good scene.
Jessica I feel sorry for you. I have left some medicine outside your front door, a tincture and a potion and some small tablets. A head of iceberg lettuce as well. Your troll can come out and get them whenever he wants. I live down the hall from you if you don' tremember. I am here for forced errors.
ReplyDeleteAn Easter contest! If you know the source of this comedic bit, you could win a gross of Peeps! (Fairybutler not eligible. Since FB just saw the same bit!)
ReplyDelete"All seeing? Yes.
All knowing? Yes...but I'm not a know it all.
Is there anything i'm proud of? My son.
Jesus, you're the tops and you
teach me something new every day."
I am dull and dense MM. I have to admit I do not know the bit.
ReplyDeleteI don't know that one. I'm stumped. But I sure could go for some peeps. Especially if they're a little stale.
ReplyDeleteAnonymous, you are too mercurial.
ReplyDeleteI have a tingle in my bingo again today.
ReplyDeleteare you playing bingo?
ReplyDeleteI'm playing the bongos.
ReplyDeleteI am playing nothing but how many cadbury cream eggs can I eat in a row. Man are they tasty.
ReplyDeleteMy mouth is beginning to splinter from the sweetness. I am approaching my threshold after 9.
ReplyDeleteMM, if I eat that much sugar I go insane. Like crazy. Institutionalized. All I want is a pepsi.
ReplyDeleteI would like a pepsi with my coffee and my eggs. I love cola and coffee. I know it's wrong, but still, it is so satisfying. Are you going to church this morning? I am going in with a supersoaker later. It will be funny.
ReplyDeleteI am not allowed insode the church due to my failed exorcism. I harbor too much evil. I believe the super soaker will be a useful tool during Easater services.
ReplyDeleteI always eat poi on Easter. My dad is Hawaiian. I like poi, pineapple and a roasted pig. I live in New Jersey now. I've been to Hawaii twice and everyone was very friendly. Gotta go, love, Pam
ReplyDelete`Eâ, no laila, e hele `oukou `ao mai i ka `ôlelo Hawai`, Pam.
ReplyDeleteThank you PD. I love the Hawaiian Punch. But I love the Kool Aid more.
ReplyDeletePD, psst!!! Come over here!!! I have some candy for you in my pocket.
ReplyDeleteKool aid is great but I prefer Tang.
ReplyDeleteI miss tang!!! That reminds me of strange Thai tang. Where has he/she run off to?
ReplyDeletePD I want to go skydiving with you. Nude.
ReplyDeleteI am going to a friend's house to paint easter eggs. Can you imagine anything more retarded? I have vowed only to paint gory images on the eggs. I may try to imagine each one is a cyst or tumor of some kind. I hate people.
ReplyDeleteI hate people too. I only like high class hos.
ReplyDelete