Jael is a science fiction and fantasy artist/illustrator. According to her website she is considered to be one of the foremost female artists of today. I believe she is visiting us from a future that includes much in the way of colored fog. Please visit www.jael.net to see more wonderment.
mm, is it true that in the future everything will be all melty and twilit? will we be able to breathe underwater? will we ride around in bubbles? a sloth hopes.
ReplyDeleteSloth yes, I hear tell it will be like milky candy with glowing orb-spores everywhere. Don't forget the power of the crystal. Expect that your ears will be somewhat elfin.
ReplyDeleteLuckily, in the future, old-growth forests will be abundant. See preponderance of large roots, the better to trip over, lest you are transporting in a bubble, in which case you've only turbulent air over which to fret (or embrace).
ReplyDeleteWe are morphing into merman at this very moment. i bet jael sell makes more money from art than i do.
ReplyDeleteOOOHHH.....ambrosia.
ReplyDeleteHi other MM. Turbulence is for embracing is my feeling. Fairy, if you were willing to do book cover illustrations, calendar art, portraits of children and pets for commission and possibly a line of greeting cards maybe you would make as much as Jael. Let's start a business, if you are willing I am willing. Carving figurines might have to be part of it. Anyone is iinvited to join this business venture. Capt'n please come aboard.
ReplyDeletei am ready for this venture mm. dried poo carvings might be the simplest way to get started (and inexpensive for initial investment!). i would also like to develop a line of designer kleenex box illustrations and perhaps partner with a mint to develop a special coin. like that 911 coin that turns into a standing scultpure. i bet you can imagine what i am thinking.
ReplyDeletea series of coins that celebrate the miracle of the human body.
ReplyDeletelast thought. let's partner with birkenstock and decorate those comfy sandals.
ReplyDeleteThat is very smart FB. Like a bladder coin? An udder coin? A fatty liver coin? A polyp-riddled colon coin? This is what comes to mind.
ReplyDeleteAny type of comfort footwear can and should be decorated. Maybe 3-D elements like thorns and stubborn weeds.
ReplyDeleteAnd what about emblazoning handbags and tote bags with mental illness related mottos and slogans.
ReplyDelete1. Sobriety is for suckers
2. I am lonely all the time
3. Don't touch me, I'm Bipolar
I am going to work on small pewter figurines with crystals maybe in the fantasy genre. I think that's really an untapped market.
ReplyDeleteAs for mental health related mottos on handbags, I think Pfizer might back "Where's my Zoloft?"
"Booze is my bag" canvas totes?
ReplyDeletei like the idea of the 3-d thorn sandal- very nice. also:
barbed wire sandal
crucifix lyrical sandal
a sandal that incorporates those gangsta bronze multiple finger rings (in this case for toes)
let's market a pewter homeless village. the crystals can be actual crystal meth or crack (imitation). accessories include:
pewter shopping carts
scrap metal pile
mattresses
Please can we get to work on this. These are high concept products sure to sell. Homeless village is excellent - don't forget small poos everywhere and maybe tape recordings of "heeeeyyyyy mommy" could be a part of it.
ReplyDeleteMore sayings for canvas totes:
1. I am drunk right now
2. I wear diapers
3. Get out of my way
4. Stop smiling, I hate you
5. I met my girlfriend in prison
6. The holocaust never happened
I'm in. What about a line of rain sticks, masks, and digery don'ts?
ReplyDeleteAm I straying off point?
ReplyDeletewe can incorporate the rain stick into the pewter village, part of the subway musician series. or combine rain stick with a bong.? these are all good ideas.
ReplyDeletemm, i am enjoying #2 . maybe we can do a 2-sided saying bag. you can switch the facing out side depending on your mood.
ReplyDeleteother sayings:
1. pubic mold - smell it - live it
2. U R a fucking fuck
3. i am searching for meaning.
4. AARP
Yeah. Wear a mask while carrying a tote bag that says on one side:
ReplyDeleteAnal rape happens
and on the other:
Mutual of Omaha
Hard to follow "I met my girlfriend in prison" and "The Holocaust never happened" with anything nearly as catchy...
ReplyDeletehmmm....thinking...
what about:
1. Le Bag
2. I'm not gay but my bag is
3. Is it beer o'clock yet?
4. I'm so broke I can't even pay attention
5. Ask me about my low grade depression
There are better ideas for bags, I know.
ReplyDeleteSorry. I am fixated on anal rape for some reason, it soothes me.
I hate people.
I killed my cat.
Ask me about my low grade depression!!
ReplyDeleteI LOVE that one.
Beware! I am Frogs.
ReplyDeleteI will carry a tote made of frogs that I hate. Frogskin is smooth.
Frogs, please tell your friend MM that I was literally cracking up over I met my girlfriend in prison and the holocaust never happened, in fact writing it out again is just an excuse to laugh again.
ReplyDeleteAnd the anal rape/mutual of omaha....I'm just picturing you walking around with that bag, mountain man, and I have to say it doesn't get much better than that.
ReplyDelete1)Excuse my French Pussy
ReplyDelete2)Hold Your Horses
3)Reach out and touch someone
1)Now What?
ReplyDelete2)Why me
3)Thanks for Fucking Off
1. Ask me if I care
ReplyDelete2. What part of fuck off don't you understand
3. I don't like Mondays
4. TGIF
5. Got baggage?
6. My other bag is a broom
1. horses have feelings
ReplyDelete2. can't stop. can't stop.
3. manure is nice
4. chopping you up feels good.
5. timber. you deserve kicking over.
6. snort for Jesus.
7. snot sucks
8. bald eagle.
9. everything doesn't matter.
10. entropy brain
11. sickness is comparative.
12. it is an issue with HIM.
1. don't ask, it runs in the family
ReplyDelete2. i don't like your hair
3. snoopy is dead
4. ass hater
1. portion control is a conspiracy.
ReplyDelete2. against all things
3. silence is a shark
4. tooth. teeth. fangs.
5. cancer
6. aids
7. syphilis
8. buspar
9. klonopin lovah.
1.cherish your rage
ReplyDelete2. oozing cut
haha "stop smiling, I hate you" & "got baggage?"... snorts.
ReplyDelete1. This is my fun bag, and yes, it's real.
2. Tote-ally hooked on hemp.
3. STOP violating my subjectivity with your patriarchal and colonizing male gaze, dickweed.
4. Ceci n'est pas une barf bag
5. I listen to NPR for free, ha-ha!
6. Going brown for america
ReplyDelete7. The royal "we:" use it!
8. Emotionally handicapable!
ugh, overuse of exclamation points, sorry. trying to wake myself up ...
ReplyDeleteI brake for no one.
ReplyDeletewhy suffer in silence?
U R dying. Fact.
donde está my soul
snakes are people too
evolution is relative
OK I want to create a heavily accessoried outfit that has every single one of Hammy's slogans. I will make use of collars, pockets, shoelaces, pins, bags, hats, rings, socks, underwear, belly chains, power cuffs, earrings and earrags. Oh and wheels on roller skates. I will find a spot to emblazon and/or etch every one on your lists.
ReplyDeleteDon't ask, it runs in the family. !!!! How true.
ReplyDelete1. You look old.
ReplyDelete2. I can smell you from here.
3. DO NOT SPEAK TO ME
snorts. I love these lists MM. Only 40 min until I get to eat again.
ReplyDeleteDon't touch me, I'm bipolar!!
ReplyDeleteonly 40 minutes until i get to eat again
ReplyDeletethat's a good one too.
except that I was serious. i live for dinner.
ReplyDeleteI know you were serious Hams, it's just that everything you say I want to have on a tote. You make me laugh.
ReplyDeleteHammy, tell: when you have dinner, is it ever ham?
ReplyDeletewow, I missed the list!
ReplyDelete1. Check your bucket
2. Birkenstocks kill
3. Chicken finger rapes / mozzarella stick rapes
4. I saw Jesus
5. I met my girlfriend in rehab
I met Jesus in prison
ReplyDeleteStop smiling, Jesus hates you
You ARE alone
I only eat ham on easter. Unacceptable.
ReplyDeleteSlothy, do you eat ham ofen?
"I saw Jesus too."
"Little Jesus Bag."
ReplyDeletesatan, I hate him.
ReplyDeleteMy other bag holds satan
ReplyDeleteI brake for satan
biohazard
ReplyDeletego away
sigh
gassy
ReplyDeletehemmeroids are the new aids.
don't hate hyenas
Herpes: It's not funny
ReplyDeleteMy dog has hind wheels
That joke isn't funny anymore
Your mom.
ReplyDeleteEat seal not veal.