I cannot believe it is true but it is. The paintings left the studio this morning, I was there in the wee hours and then the early hours and then finally they exited. I could not be more pleased and relieved. There has been only one sacrifice in this unholy endeavor and that is my voice. I sound like I imagine Frogs should, I am in possession of laryngitis. You would not think that painting would lead to voice capacity reduction but think again - this is a warning for all you who are considering switching careers. Speaking of switching careers, Corny has an excellent list of alternatives for those of us who are wanting to switch out of the unwholesome bipolar career of fine arts. Here is my list:
1. Tail Grower
2. Device Holder
3. Food Weigher
4. Penis Trafficker
5. Swimming Pool
I did not see Corny's list yet but I will let you know my additions.
ReplyDeleteMind Bender
Spoon Minder
Tinfoil Biter
Krixiebelle!!! How are you today? I think you are a dirty Tinfoil Biter from the great beyond.
ReplyDeleteI also meant to say congratulatory things to you MM, like "Congratulations!"
ReplyDeletekrix is not one of us. She has not paid the initiation dues.
ReplyDeleteMM, hi! I am swell and swelling. How are your vocals chords? are they damamged from victory screaming after the relic completion?
ReplyDeletePay up Krix! Maybe they will waive the fee for you special-like because you have bit so much foil in your time. It can't hurt to ask.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your congratulations. I am repeating same to self in head.
Yes there was an intense 12 hour long scream into the fires session. I believe there are embers still crackling in my larynx. That is the reason for the squeakies.
ReplyDeleteCongras MM!! how very exciting. I can't wait to see them. Are you drinking pints of malt liquor sunburnt and on the stoop?
ReplyDeletei'm interested in device holding, i think i have experience.
Lupis be careful with the device holding, you may overuse your holder and grow fur in the wrong spot.
ReplyDeleteCongrats dear mm. I am looking forward to the hoe down...you ho.
ReplyDeleteI missed you.
I am a ho. I cannot help it. It is part of my qualification for Penis Trafficker.
ReplyDeleteDevice holding is tough Lupis. I am impressed.
ReplyDeleteI want to be:
ReplyDeleteOxy quality controller
Jack Daniels distributor
my voice is whores for,m screaming. i miss frogs. that filthy barnicle head.glaaaxsaaa
ReplyDeleteFrogs is clean, inside and out, clean as whistles blowing in the morning sun. The oily intoxicants are emerging from the pores.
ReplyDeleteFck YEAH with the doneness, MM. Can we go to a movie now?
ReplyDeleteThanks Slothy!
ReplyDeleteI am excited and almost ready for movie. Must recuperate from pesky voice loss first. Tireds must go.
ReplyDeleteI am done too...will someone take me off the pit?
ReplyDeleteBurnt Kitty you taste delicious. Get back into your bun.
ReplyDeleteMMMM, burnt kitty, you are almost as tasty as burnt-up baby. I am liking my fingers.
ReplyDeletemm, will you be sending out the info for the ho-show?
ReplyDeleteI am also licking my fingers because I like them so much.
ReplyDeletelick my back frogs?
ReplyDeletecongratulations mm! i did not call the ASPCA after the shaved kitty post because i knew you were busy with the relics. otherwise you would be in jail right now. just sayin.
ReplyDeleteWW !!!! Send me to jail anyway!!!! I want to go. Will you be my warden? We can have an affair through the bars. If you want. Or I could read your cards from my stained mattress as you gaze longingly down the dirty corridor, yearning for a better life. Just saying.
ReplyDeleteWhats with all this nob-thatchery? You want to go into the Penis relocation business? I got a funny uncle who can set you up good and hard
ReplyDeletei will be your warden. i like things done a certain way. i am warning you not to cross me.
ReplyDeleteI like this funny uncle corns. Give me his number.
ReplyDeleteWW, I will not dare cross you, you are uniformed and in charge.
Jeez MM, keep it in your pants! I'm gettin' tired of this, you whore.
ReplyDeleteI can't help it. It is my nature to be an abusive chum eating whore. Also I am a fan of mustard. My throat is killing from over-perpetrations. I can't tell what's what.
ReplyDeleteyeah, yeah. I've heard it all before. Right down to the sore throat.
ReplyDeleteoops! I mean you know who. (not pd)
ReplyDeletePeeds you meanie. Call me and you will hear Frogs. Or maybe it's Ducks I am not so sure. I am sick as a fly on the windscreen, it is par for the course.
ReplyDeleteIt's a question of lust, hey?
ReplyDeleteSorry you are as sick as fly. Have a warm elixir of honey and ginger tea. Good for all that ills you.
I say you will be all fixed up by tomorrow night. Then you can have a black celebration.
ReplyDeletePeedee I am picturing you in a hair apron serving me this soothing tea. You have altoids on your tooths.
ReplyDeleteI'll drink to that.
ReplyDeleteCome here, kiss me, now.................
ReplyDeleteYes, booze rots your teeth!
ReplyDeleteI am wearing only the hair apron (and back braids) and altoids. It is my special outfit.
Kizza me....
ReplyDeleteOui Peeds. I kizza.
ReplyDeleteHow are your paintings coming along? Are you all finished for your show? The lilting loveliness is emanating from LIC, I bet.
Ready. All small ptgs. a go. One of the medium ones has a red that will never dry! So may have to nix that one.
ReplyDeleteThe shack was fun today. I listened to some bad music. It was truly the shack of shame.
What were the tunes?
ReplyDeleteI miss oil paints sometimes but what I don't miss is the drying time....can't wait to see them, Meatlover.
Are you ready...The Boys are Back in Town, by Thin Lizzy, for one.
ReplyDeleteYou gots to come see the big ones. I am sad that I will only be showing the little guys.
PD after my opening & I move the studio I would like to come over. Very much.
ReplyDeleteThe Boys are Back in Town - I feel like you put that on a CD for me once maybe....
ReplyDeleteWhere you movin?
ReplyDeleteI found a really cheap studio for 6 months in Williamsburg. I can save some money until I find something better in the fall. It is really tiny, not the best, but I didn't have the time to really look. I have to be out on the 15th!
ReplyDeleteOh, I thought you at least had until the very end of May. Those F*&%$$#ers
ReplyDeleteThe plan sounds good. You will probably be in PA for a good part of the summer too.
There is a guy in my studio bldg. who wears surgical covers on his shoes (you know those surgical paper covers for your feet) when he paints. He freaks me out when I see him in the hall.
ReplyDeleteDon't let that slimer near your ganoush, if you receive my meaning. He might circumcise you.
ReplyDeletei like steely dan.
ReplyDeleteI like to be kicked in the nuts.
ReplyDeleteeye will volunteer to kick you in the 'nads, MM. I have been practicing on the babies, and your plums beckon so sweetly.
ReplyDeleteI don't want to brag but they're more like lemons. Sloth. Please kick them, I deeply saturate your offer.
ReplyDeletemm, if I kick 'em real hard we can surely make lemonade out'n them lemins. country-tyme.
ReplyDeletesee what happens when you blog too late???? you led me down this dark path to badness, MM!!!
ReplyDeleteSlothers it's a light path to goodness. Yes. Violence in the groin is for the betterment of humanity. At least this is my feeling. Lemonade is leaking onto my night-trousers. (sorry).
ReplyDeleteDelights in the night to you Sloth. Pet pet, night night.
pets to you too, ems. happy dreams.
ReplyDeletegood night and thank my lonely angel wart that my genial disease isn't spreading to you .
ReplyDeletethe sleeps are evading. good morning people.
ReplyDeletecongrats mm - i am looking forward to next week's hodown triumph! i took the motherbutler to chelsea yesterday for just a little while. it was not a wise decision.
ReplyDeleteWo ist der kunst?
ReplyDeleteGaylord, email me at doodlebug666@aol.com, I will send you the info. I no have your email. Yes? Yes.
ReplyDeleteYAYYY!!!
ReplyDeleteCHAMPION!!!!
All the best and love and celebratory congratulations to you, friend. Gree C. and Gaylord are the lucky ones who get to go to your opening. I am sending them as messengers to say hello for me. That is their sole purpose in life.
Your new career choice should be champion of the world.
Dearest Capt'n, you are the dearest person, I was missing you like crazy, wondering if you had been lost in a vortex between the low countries and the west. I hope to see your ambassadors Gree C. and Gaylord, but I certainly wish I could see you there too! I hope Team Shredder heals soon from the sinus disasters. For myself, I am magnetically attracted to my bed and I will not leave it until I am ready. My beard has grown so long it wraps around my toes and I am accepting the cereal that the invisible monkey spoon feeds me. Do not worry, I assure you this is real.
ReplyDeleteAs long as the monkey make nice, it's ok with me.
ReplyDelete